Center for Hope & Safety
Healing from Sexual Assault
For the sexual assault survivor, the attack is just the beginning of the trauma. Afterward, she may experience at least some of the following feelings and reactions:
- Fear of the sexual offender’s return
- Frustration with the legal process
- Destruction of her trust in people, even those in no way connected to the assault
- Misplaced anger directed toward her from her husband or partner
- Criticism and/or some level of shunning from her family and friends as well as from society in general
- Physical scars and/or disabilities
- HIV/AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases
- Pregnancy
- Feelings of extreme isolation
- Sleep disorders
- Fear
- Loss of self-esteem
- Guilt that she in some way caused the assault
- Loss of a sense of control
- Loss of a sense of security in her surroundings
Just as most women do not report their sexual assault to authorities - fewer than 10 percent do, it is estimated - many victims will not tell anyone at all.
Choosing to deal with the assault on their own, many sexual assault survivors feel that keeping the assault quiet is their only way to regain control of their lives. Fear of being blamed for the assault, and a sense of isolation, contributes to the decision not to tell anyone, at least not right away.
Whether or not the survivor confides in someone, she may be in a kind of shock for days. The survivor may have a feeling of surrealism, an inability to process what is happening. A sexual assault survivor may appear calm but feel out of control. All of these reactions may mean the survivor is in shock. Shock anesthetizes the mind and body to help the victim survive the assault.
Relatively few sexual assault survivors choose to get professional counseling. Yet, for many women, it may be helpful to talk with a safe, caring, and supportive person.
If she has just been sexually assaulted, our first concern is that the survivor is safe, that she has a safe place to stay and safe people to be with. If she calls our crisis hotline, she may be invited to go to Winston House, the CHS shelter. Most often survivors of sexual assault prefer to stay with close, supportive friends and receive follow-up supportive services from a sexual assault program.
A woman who wants to report that she has been sexually assaulted to the police is encouraged to go to the hospital immediately for an exam by trained medical staff. At the hospital, the woman also may have the assistance of a Sexual Assault Victim Advocate from the district attorney’s office (see Sexual Assault and the Justice System for more information).
Counseling will help the sexual assault survivor:
- Release an overwhelming flood of emotions generated by the attack, including fear, grief, and anger
- Overcome feelings of isolation
- Accept her own feelings
- Come to terms with the reality of the attack and the validity of her responses
- Regain her sense of control over her own life
- Understand and evaluate her options
- Make informed, rational choices for herself
24-hour hotline 503-399-7722
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